Into the Void

Usually when I sit down at the computer something just falls out of my head and lands on the keyboard, it's a beautiful thing, because then it grabs my attention and I enjoy tweaking. Not today, not for the past few days, tabula rasa, nada. I am neither happy or sad, optimistic nor pessimistic, I'm just trudging through each day and it's feeling monotonous. This is the last week in my cycle, my "good" week, but after grocery shopping yesterday I had to take a 3 hour nap and the rest of the day was headachy. I had my blood counts checked today and like clockwork the hospital called an hour after and a nurse asked "are you alright? do you feel ok? are you sure?" because my white blood cells, those little critters our bone marrow makes to fight infection and keep us healthy have dropped from the requisite thousands to 100. A little sniffly, but I feel fine, actually, I feel neither fine or not fine, however, I'm advised to be taking my temperature.