Friday, January 13, 2012

Pink Ribbons and Tape Dispensers

I went to Staples today to pick up a few things and it was a sea of pink. I just don’t get the ubiquitousness of the pink ribbon, it’s lost all meaning. Why does my local office supply store care so much about breast cancer and why not all cancer? Why only pink ribbons? Where are all the other ribbons for all the other types of cancer? Why does pancreatic cancer and brain cancer get dissed and who’s watching out for my ovaries? And there’s homeless veterans right outside the door, mentally ill wandering around the parking lot, how about we give a shit about that? Nah, let’s just slap a ribbon on it and feel extra good about buying crap made in China where factory's have nets because disenfranchised workers fling themselves out the windows. What do consumer goods and cancer have to do with each other at all and why is one selling the other?

What I’d really like to know is the relationship between corporate profit increase due to presence of pink ribbon to money donated for research. Ratio, I want to see some ratio, pie charts, flow charts, numbers.

I kid you not, there was a pink plastic tape dispenser in the shape of a high heeled shoe -- yes let's raise awareness of breast cancer {because it disfigures the beloved boobie} with an homage to needlessly disfiguring and crippling fashion.

Last year, my son’s high school football team had to wear pink socks during Breast Cancer Awareness Month but I don’t think most of the kids really knew why they were wearing pink socks -- just that they were given to them and told to wear them. My son’s team wears purple, in fact, they’re so low rent, they don’t even have a name, they’re just The Purple, “Go Purple”, and they looked pretty adorable with the pink socks, so I admit to enjoying it, but it did not raise my awareness of breast cancer... I’d already heard of it, just didn’t know I had it. They played one game against a red team and the red uniforms mixed with the pink socks made the players look like a bunch of tubby cupids running in circles looking for their arrows, priceless. High heel shoe tape dispenser, not so much.

Because I was so late buying my at-a-glance calendar, I had no choice but to get a black one with a pink ribbon stamped on it and every time I see it, it’s like it’s mocking me, I hate you pink ribbon, I really wish you weren’t in my face, all the time, wherever I go.


  1. If its any consolation (and I know its not but what the hell, here it is anyway) the whole "Walk for BLANK" theme of getting something for your money kind of charity has diversified over the past few years. The 60 mile walk for breast cancer and 5K run for a cure has beget the "Run up the stairs of a skyscraper" for lung cancer and the light up the night walk for ...uh...bone cancer, I think. You could say that the whole Walk for BLANK and feel like you're doing something but give us your money schtick is spreading just like the thing its trying to cure.

  2. better though than the shameless corporate profit in the guise of "curing cancer". at least a walk-a-thon is a community building thing... but so much money goes to just running these things. i think susan g. komen... the worst of the worst spends their money having galas for themselves where they raise more money for the next gala.