Maple Syrup

Never drive to school to pick up your kid half in your jammies because you figure you're not going to be getting out of the car... just picking them up out front and zipping right back home. That's what I did today after G's last final exam, but on the way home, hitting an incline my junker of a vehicle started making a bad sound, smelled like maple syrup and the temp needle zipped up to "H". At least that part worked because all of a sudden there was smoke heaving out the vents into the car and from under the hood, and before I knew it I was walking home from the mechanics. I only mention the maple syrup smell because I swear I heard someone mention that on Car Talk one time, and damn it if it doesn't smell exactly like maple syrup. I think that has something to do with burning coolant, maybe not, but if your car ever smells like maple syrup, take it in quick.

Another hefty investment in the Mazda money pit despite the last two times this year I had to do the same and I swore, never again. I know I'm in denial, I need to buy a car, but it's such an unpleasant thing to do and now is not a good time. I said that before I got sick, but now it really, truly isn't a good time, but I'm spending more to keep this thing on the road than buying something new. I've got to get over this denial thing and decide what to buy, so I'm ready next time it tries to commit suicide. What kills me is that I barely drive the thing these days because I'm usually too wacked out on drugs or tired to drive, so I venture as far as school, the studio and the grocery store, so it's not like wear and tear is bringing this nonsense on, it's got a death wish.

But what to buy and where {and how}? I can't make these decisions right now and I'm hung up on my desire to keep the third row of seats. I still often fill the van up with kids needing rides and without the third row I can't do it, but it's so much more expensive to get something that size. Yet I'll regret it if I don't, I'll feel terrible, I'll feel guilty, but who am I kidding? I can't afford it. Yay Republicans, tax cuts for the rich, yahoo, and please, please, please take away my health insurance.

Heading to chemo tomorrow and those freaking white cells better be present and accounted for. This project has to get back on track, moving forward, so there is some kind of end in sight, and I need to stop eating junk food. Today I drank a diet coke for the first time in seven months, not a good sign, but I was drowning my sorrows, I suppose there are worse vices.