Crashing is so painful after feeling marginally well for so long, but crashed, I have. Yesterday was just awful, I couldn't get off the couch when J came home from school, and then he started to worry about me. He asked if this was normal and I mustered a cheerful "yep" and he said good because "I will call 911 so fast if it's not normal". It's good to know 911 has super powers.
Today not so great either and when J came home I could tell he wasn't right and so I took him to the pediatrician, just intuiting I shouldn't wait until Monday, and sure enough he has strep throat which I don't think he's ever had. Instead of caring for him and cuddling on the coach and stroking his head, I'm avoiding the poor little dude like the plague, scared to death that I'll catch it because one more ailment or medication will put me over the edge. I've never, ever responded to a sick kid this way, germs be damned, don't care if I catch something or not, I don't even care who's kid it is.
The Neupogen shots are making my bones and back ache and the Taxol is making my feet numb which may be permanent and I don't like it and 8 more weeks of it scares the hell out of me.
We both need to get right before next week because Monday night is the "Sports Awards Dinner" which the long one has invited me to and Thursday is both elementary school graduation and Improv performance and I'm not missing any of those!
sorry to hear all this! strep sucks, but staying clear is the best idea...J is an old soul and def gets it! wishing u magical healing powers and uber strength 4 next week...much love from ny, my brave and strong friend xox
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