Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Bouncy Balls

Last night I told the boys, that if I was feeling o.k. this Saturday we should go to Friday Night Live. They thought that was funny, so yeah, I guess my brain is a little scrambled. Scrambled like egg.

Aside from scrambled brain and some wooziness I feel fine today. Yesterday had it's moments, but all seems well. This new cocktail is accompanied by simultaneous Benedryl and steroids to ward off too common allergic reactions. They don't explain this stuff to you, they tell you about the main drugs, but not the supplementary drugs they're dripping in too. I am a girl who can't handle her Benedryl, I stopped taking it years ago, it wipes me out for days and causes depression. It's unlike me to be aware enough to make causal correlations, but the benedryl/depression thing became obvious and then I looked it up and it's not uncommon. A lot of moms with young babies, myself included, occasionally give baby-sized doses of Benedryl to our kids when they simply will not be soothed into sleep, and we are desperate. I wonder if all those little babies were depressed the next day.

An hour after lodging myself comfortable in the chemo chair I was nodding off despite how damned cold it always is in there. And then the steroids kicked in so I'm half asleep and bouncing around at the same time, my legs and feet couldn't stop, most literally. On the inside I felt like everything contained within my outer dermis had turned into super-charged, brightly colored, striped and polka-dotted, super balls bouncing frantically in every direction. Luckily it eventually passed and today I have only minor jitters and I hope things stay calm. Still, not happy about the Benedryl and steroids.

Otherwise I really do feel fine, I'm used to the dry mouth and hot on the outside, cold on the inside, tossing and turning all night long, but thus far, I feel quite manageable. I might just get to Friday Night Live on Friday. I'm going to shower and attempt some errands, this was not possible on day #2 of last cycle. Fingers are crossed.

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