Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Centered, Cultured and Cultivated

I slept with the window open last night, it was heavenly. Last night seems a long time ago, in this cold, blustery, flustery storm that is making all of my old windows rattle. Most of the windows in the house need new cords so that they’ll open and close without a struggle and won’t need books propping them up so they don’t spontaneously crash down, cat squashing, limb crushing or wood splintering. Another thing I wish I’d pushed to have remediated while I had a co-owner with cash flow. I stopped asking for things to get done a long time ago because I just dreaded the dead pan “is that really necessary?” or “can we really afford that?” Yes, yes, we probably could have. Looking back I don’t know why I didn’t just say “yes, yes, that is really necessary.” I don’t know why I’m so conflict averse when I grew up surrounded by so much conflict, well maybe that’s why, and maybe I was just defeated, deflated. I like getting things done, you know what floats my boat, what really turns me on? Guys that get shit done. If I were a man, maybe that’s what my OkCupid profile would say, “I get shit done.” I have a friend who laments the lack of women in his life and attributes it to his theory that women only like men who treat them badly, women like assholes and he’s too nice. I don’t think that’s it... maybe younger women like that distant, elusive, selfish type, maybe I did once, but hell, we grow up. Nothing is more exciting to me than sweetness and thoughtfulness. Someone who’s actually interested in my day, that would make me swoon. Someone who is smart and creative and funny and sweet, thoughtful and kind, I’m placing my order for that on Amazon.com right away, I hope I get free 2-day shipping, OkCupid isn’t coming through.

My garage door entered the afterlife after all the springs and cables burst the other day. After wedging it open, the door is so clearly rotted, shredding, and falling apart it doesn’t make sense to fix it and I’m not spending my sparse cash on a garage door, no thank you, that is way too depressing a purchase. I’m just going to staple up a tarp and call it a day. I suppose if someone wants to steal my broom and rakes there’s nothing I can do to stop them. And, I do love using my staple gun, so I don’t mind. After wrenching the door open last weekend from where it's not planning on closing, I finally got some yardwork done and the tall one was great about helping and did things in a much more adult way. We had a lot of limbs down that needed to be cut up and carted out to the curb and instead of tossing two into a yard waste bin and saying it was full because they were criss-crossed, I saw packed bins filled with vertical sticks and my heart breathed a sigh of relief. Progress.

Yesterday, the 13-year old got frustrated with homework, I don’t really blame him, the assignment was stupid and annoying and from my point of view pretty useless, but none the less, the laws of life dictate that little boys and girls must do their homework. He’s been coping really well with homework this year, we’ve had our moments, but suddenly, he regressed, five, eight years and was grabbing furniture cushions and throwing them around. Unacceptable and I told him to go up to his room to calm down. He usually won’t go, but he stomped up there and I let him cool down. When I went up to check, he was asleep in bed, half covered in a blanket, dresser drawers on the floor and an entire roll of toilet paper strewn across his room. A for effort, it was quite a sight, that boy gets shit done. I thought he’d sleep through the night, but he got up, chilled out and practiced the trumpet. It was really strange, such a sudden and powerful regression, I haven’t seen a fit like that in some time and it makes me realize I should be appreciative of how easy life has become. I have a trash can full of vertical sticks and fits are way outside the norm.

The trumpet teacher showed up for boy’s first lesson, messy and dishelveled, wearing a Doctor Who sweatshirt among other geeky accessories and when I opened the door and saw her I wanted to cry. I greeted her with “oh my god, you’re one of us, come in.” And it all went famously from there. I have been witness to actual voluntary practicing and now I can’t get the elephant march from the Jungle Book out of my head.

I can’t believe there is no school for six days straight. Boys will go to their dads for one of them, the rest they’re with me... how is that not reflected in the child support guidelines? I’m wrestling with the same paradox and I have to stop, it is what it is and being perpetually annoyed serves no purpose.

I know a lot of people have met folks on dating sites, but I don’t think it’s for me. I’ve found the conversations I’ve had unsettlingly disjointed and empty and there’s just too much flotsam to shuffle through. I don’t have the time or dedication to spend hours pouring over profiles, there’s too much real life out there. I've found the process alienating and I get more fulfillment from cleaning out my attic and plotting my next project, party or trip. I'm going to leave the dating sites behind, and anyone who is in a decent relationship, rejoice, work hard, be creative, otherwise, you’ll be spending your late nights reading profiles like the following. At least it's entertaining, although I find his "safe passion rule" a bit extreme, although, mercifully, he isn't looking for that "one special lady to wine and dine."

Centered, cultured, cultivatad but a bit edgy &wild, stable, dedicated, peaceful & happy.

I love education, but more importantly: inspiration, or delicious quality excitement. The seduction of mind AND body.

My "follow your bliss" formula: Creative bold expressive sensuous teasing
Letting go preconceived notions.
The Safe Passion Rule: No coitus or oral, but complete honest exchange of feelings & desires... open up the mind; celebrate the body; divine hotness! No holding back.

NOW is a time of randy experimentation & exploration. "Wham bam thank you ma'm" or "Whir blur thank you sir" is pointless. Let's cultivate boldness & butterflies! Enjoy surrendering & sharing our thoughts, feelings & fantasies without fear. Let's create our own paths; not be shackled by self-imposed boring prisons. "TRUST yourself! Then you will know how to live!" (Goethe)

"Be not like dumb, driven cattle! Be a hero in the strife!"
(from The Psalm of Life by Longfellow)
What I’m doing with my life
My work is a bit too esoteric & unique for discussion here now :)
Self employed since 1985. I'm trained as a writer and ran my own publishing company. Also a certified physical fitness specialist - very advanced with 35 years professional experience & owned several fitness businesses. Certified in nutrition & experienced in epdimiology. Certified chef; owned & operated a gourmet school.
Currently own another unique established business of own creation.

"There are a thousand hacking at the branches of evil to one who is striking at the root."- Henry David Thoreau

"Who rises late must trot all day" - American Proverb

"Men {and women} sometimes stumble over the truth but they pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing happened" -W Churchill

"I have endeavored to show that medicine is not only not necessary but injurious to all mankind" - Gandhi

"Medicine is designed to amuse the patient while nature cures the disease"- Voltalire
I’m really good at Inspiration.

And I give great massage. hey... even got my own table.
The first things people usually notice about me
They say my Smile, eyes, butt, voice, stature & charisma.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Breaking Bad.
From Omar Khayam, Emerson.... to T Colin Campbell, Joseph Campbell...isaac Asimov...The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty, The Art of Sexual Magic by Margot Anand, DH Lawrence, so many more.

The Princess Bride, Tommy,The Big Lebowski, Being There, Phenomenon, Manon of the Spring, Jean De Florette, Seven Beauties, Leap of Faith, Princess Bride, Get Shorty, Reacher, Zohan, Austin Powers,. Star Trek NOT Star Wars. (Star Wars was LAME to someone who had already read ALL the best sci-fi by age 11).

I love Sinatra to Zeppelin & more not heard of.
Tom Barabas, Roul DiBlasio, Pink Floyd, Johhny Cougar Melencamp, classics, ambient space & progressive pieces.Took classical piano lessons nine years as child.

Food: I eat to enhance my life & great enjoyment of it. Not merely gourmand taste or emotional need.
I have long since matured off the perpetual pacifier advancing gracefully to more lasting & fulfilling pleasures than "wine & cheese" or "creme lattes".

As a result I have not suffered even the slightest cold or flu symptom for 12 years in a row. No drugs, pills powders or mumbo jumbo "natural doctor" gimmicks. And so much more...
The six things I could never do without My mom, my friends, my dad (lives in my heart), my passion, my imagination, & tolerance.

Oh. & my super duper deluxe 3D robotic massage chair.
I spend a lot of time thinking about how lucky & blessed I am to be alive.
On a typical Friday night I am
Relaxing at my house after inviting my incredibly youthful & terrific mom over for dinner and a movie.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I was a 130 lb. weakling; beat up almost daily & made fun of & called skinny & "gay" in high school since I moved to LI from a Manhattan private school, and was "smarter" by several years comparison. After sevearl years of self transformation I became a stripper per the encouragement of a female-friend and against my "better nerd judgement".
I’m looking for
Girls who like guys
Ages 40–99
Near me
For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
The obvious: you like what you see & read.
You like to be inspired.
You like an exciting non traditional guy.
You value the mind & physical body equally. And of course you are sexy & cute!

1 comment:

  1. I suspect the guy who posted that profile bored all his previous dates to distraction. Gawd!

    ReplyDelete